A Step-by-Step Guide to Healthy, Inclusive Masculinity & Leadership.

Showing Up

Showing Up: How Men Can Become Effective Allies in the Workplace

Pre-order Showing Up for Your Team and Receive a Credit for the Value of Your Book Order Towards a Virtual or Live Keynote from Ray


With your purchase of Showing Up (paperback or ebook) you’ll receive a free ticket to the Better Man Conference—a 3-hour virtual event.

The Better Man Conference utilizes authentic leadership and strategic storytelling to model the vulnerability and empathy required to shift us from curious to connected and aware allies.

How many of us see accountability as an ally’s superpower? It’s the key to moving ourselves through the fear, fragility and shame that often cause us to freeze instead of interrupting the inequity and exclusion we witness. It is, in fact, how we transform our culture to cultivate connection.   

Join us from 9am - 12pm PDT via webinar (2022 dates to be announced). The Better Man Conference is designed to engage audiences through inspiring speakers, active Q & A, plus tactical takeaways from featured subject matter experts and relevant resources.


Organizations worldwide are finally realizing the critical importance of diversity, equity, and inclusivity (DEI) for underrepresented people. Men are being called to enact heart-based leadership, increase diversity, bolster the bottom line, and create a culture so everyone in the workplace wins.

The Times Up, Me Too, and Black Lives Matter movements have been wake-up calls to all of us, but perhaps mostly for men. And It’s abundantly clear: the default model of masculinity isn’t working for anyone. 

Arata argues that mainstream gender training and its focus on the avoidance of toxic masculinity is not enough. For a new and healthier infrastructure, for permanent and transformational shifts, we need a plan that includes men.

In Showing Up, you’ll discover the DIY method of heart-based leadership Ray has used with such companies as Verizon, Bloomberg, Moody's, Intel, Toyota, Hearst, and more—a male-modeled, real-solutions approach by and for men to increase diversity, bolster the bottom line, and create a culture so everyone in the workplace wins.

What you’ll get from this book:

  • Embrace healthy masculinity as a cornerstone of inclusionary leadership
  • Identify unhealthy masculine behaviors in the workplace—like 'mansplaining', 'manterrupting', and 'manopolizing'
  • Adopt behavior modifications to become an inclusive leader and ally for underrepresented groups
  • Incorporate specific language to use in healthy discussions
  • Leverage power and position to elevate underrepresented groups

Showing Up is a “how-to” book for men in organizations seeking to be better allies and leaders. The book also gives guidance to HR, Diversity & Inclusion Professionals on how to engage their men in diversity efforts. 

Unlike other ally work which is often heady and data-driven, Arata provides a road map for supporting men to be authentic, vulnerable, and accountable including:

  • Six Principles of heart-based Leadership
  • Four steps of the Ally’s Journey
  • The Better Man Pledge
  • The Five States of men in organizations

With stories that illuminate common missteps, followed by key learning sections, and deep-dive training exercises to support the development of allyship, Showing Up turns good intentions into specific actions you can implement immediately.

Now, it’s your turn to show up.

“More people recognize the importance of Allyship—and that’s great. Unfortunately, many men still don’t know what they need to do to effect change so everyone feels valued and empowered at work. In Showing Up, Ray Arata provides clear guidance on how to turn good intentions into action. I strongly recommend it to everyone interested in helping create a more equal and productive workplace.”

—Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and founder of LeanIn.Org and OptionB.Org


Ray Arata is an author, thought leader and sought-after speaker who teaches people, leaders, and teams to embrace Inclusion & allyship  in their business and personal lives with heart based leadership.

As an inclusionary leadership expert, he partners with some of the top organizations in the world helping enhance culture,  performance, trust, and belonging.

Ray delivers keynotes and seminars (both in-person and virtually) that empower people, leaders, and teams to foster inclusion and a true sense of belonging that translates to people bringing their full selves to work and performing at optimum levels. Through his keynotes, seminars, consulting, and writing, Ray teaches important techniques that allow individuals and organizations to be more heart centered, inclusive, and effective.

Clients include



actor, filmmaker; co-founder of the Wayfarer Foundation; and author of Man Enough: Undefining My Masculinity

Showing Up…gives us the game plan we need to consciously and continually be better allies, men, and humans by showing us how to take our intentions and turn them into impact; how to connect with, stay in, and lead from our hearts.”


CEO of Cardinal Health

“In my experience, active engagement from men is a critical factor in our shared journey to achieve gender partnership and gender equity. I’m grateful to the women in my life who welcomed, fostered, and mentored my growth—enabling me to be a better leader, father, spouse, and friend. Ray Arata’s book is a helpful guide for how men can be better sponsors and advocates for women.”



"Showing Up is a critical and timely book that inspires men to stand up for gender and racial justice on the job. Ray Arata makes a compelling case that men care deeply about good leadership and equality in the workplace and Showing Up is the ‘how to’ manual for how they can intervene in ways that make them better men. This book is a must read for corporate leaders and any man who wants to live up to his potential as an ally and a leader who can shift the world—one workplace at a time.”


author of Angry White Men: American Masculinity at the End of an Era

“As men we’re trained to split ourselves in two: the rational worker in public, the emotional human at home. What a loss—on both sides of the equation. Ray Arata’s great gift is that he can help men connect heads and hearts, passion and productivity. Read this book and let him show you how to be more present at work and in life!”

gary barker, phd.

Co-founder and CEO, Promundo-US

“In a historical moment when men are called, and must show up as allies, Arata provides a clear roadmap for what that takes. His approach is brutally honest, self-reflective, and direct. Showing Up is a must read for men on this journey, and for all those who want to call men in as true allies.”


Showing Up packs a punch on the reality of male allyship in the workplace. Equally as important, it shines amazing insights on the importance of including the most influential group—straight, white men—in a discussion in which they are often left out—diversity. Arata homes in with practical strategies to engage, build trust, and strengthen your approach to creating great workplaces through allyship.”

Carin Taylor

Chief Diversity Officer of Workday

“Diversity, equity, and inclusion leaders understand how critical it is to have everyone, especially men, engaged in the work of creating an inclusive workplace (organization, society!) where all people can thrive. The challenge is making the space for men to truly connect, reflect and then eventually act—one that doesn’t also cast shame, blame, and do more harm than good. Showing Up explores healthy masculinity through Ray Arata’s inimitable voice to create that space. It’s a must read for practitioners to then share with the men in their lives and organizations.”

Cristina Santos

Head of Diversity & Inclusion and Equal Employment Opportunity, North America, Sanofi

“Ray Arata is an award-winning and devoted ally and extraordinary role model for other men, bringing understanding of human needs, knowledge of behavioral change, and a huge vision for inclusionary leadership and organizations.”

Amy Logan

Former President, US National Committee for UN Women San Francisco
Bay Area; Founder and CEO, Inclusion Innovation


Showing Up

Step 1: Order the paperback below

Showing Up book by Ray Arata. Price includes bulk shipping to one location in the USA.

STEP 2: Receive a credit for the value of your book order towards a virtual or live keynote from Ray Arata. Ray’s team will connect with you with further details after you place your order.

To order less than 5 copies please click here. 
For international bulk pre-orders contact us.

Hire Ray to deliver a keynote for your team and the value of your book order will be deducted from Ray’s speaking fee. Contact Ray’s team for details.