Showing Up

How Men Can Become Effective Allies

Showing Up is a revolutionary step-by-step guide—by and for men—to ending toxic masculinity and leveraging men to enact heart-based leadership, increase diversity, bolster the bottom line, and create a culture so everyone in the workplace wins.

In Showing Up, you’ll discover the DIY method of heart-based leadership Ray has used with such companies as Verizon, Bloomberg, Moody’s, Intel, Toyota, Hearst, and more—a male-modeled, real-solutions approach by and for men to increase diversity, bolster the bottom line, and create a culture so everyone in the workplace wins.

With stories that illuminate common missteps, followed by key learning sections, and deep-dive training exercises to support the development of allyship, Showing Up turns good intentions into specific actions you can implement immediately.

A Step-by-Step Guide to Healthy, Inclusive Masculinity and Leadership.

Showing Up is a “how-to” book for men in organizations seeking to be better allies and leaders. The book also gives guidance to HR, Diversity & Inclusion Professionals on how to engage their men in diversity efforts.

Healthy Masculinity

Embrace healthy masculinity as a cornerstone of inclusionary leadership.

Behavior Modifications

Adopt behavior modifications to become an inclusive leader and ally for underrepresented groups.

Identify Bad Habits

Identify unhealthy masculine behaviors in the workplace—like ‘mansplaining’, ‘manterrupting’, and ‘manopolizing’.

Leverage Power

Leverage power and position to elevate underrepresented groups and communities.


More people recognize the importance of Allyship—and that’s great. Unfortunately, many men still don’t know what they need to do to affect change so everyone feels valued and empowered at work. In Showing Up, Ray Arata provides clear guidance on how to turn good intentions into action. I strongly recommend it to everyone interested in helping create a more equal and productive workplace.

Sheryl Sandberg
COO of Facebook and Founder of and

Showing Up. . . gives us the game plan we need to consciously and continually be better allies, men, and humans by showing us how to take our intentions and turn them into impact; how to connect with, stay in, and lead from our hearts.

Justin Baldoni
Actor, Filmmaker; Co-founder of the Wayfarer Foundation; and author of Man Enough: Undefining My Masculinity

In my experience, active engagement from men is a critical factor in our shared journey to achieve gender partnership and gender equity. I’m grateful to the women in my life who welcomed, fostered, and mentored my growth—enabling me to be a better leader, father, spouse, and friend. Ray Arata’s book is a helpful guide for how men can be better sponsors and advocates for women.

Mike Kaufmann
CEO of Cardinal Health

Showing Up is a critical and timely book that inspires men to stand up for gender and racial justice on the job. Ray Arata makes a compelling case that men care deeply about good leadership and equality in the workplace and Showing Up is the ‘how to’ manual for how they can intervene in ways that make them better men. This book is a must-read for corporate leaders and any man who wants to live up to his potential as an ally and a leader who can shift the world—one workplace at a time.

Jennifer Siebel Newsom
Filmmaker and Founder of The Representation Project

As men, we’re trained to split ourselves in two: the rational worker in public, the emotional human at home. What a loss—on both sides of the equation. Ray Arata’s great gift is that he can help men connect heads and hearts, passion and productivity. Read this book and let him show you how to be more present at work and in life!

Michael Kimmel
Author of "Angry White Men: American Masculinity at the End of an Era"

In a historical moment when men are called and must show up as allies, Arata provides a clear roadmap for what that takes. His approach is brutally honest, self-reflective, and direct. Showing Up is a must-read for men on this journey, and for all those who want to call men in as true allies.

Gary Barker, PhD
Co-founder and CEO, Promundo-US

Showing Up packs a punch on the reality of male allyship in the workplace. Equally as important, it shines amazing insights on the importance of including the most influential group—straight, white men—in a discussion in which they are often left out—diversity. Arata homes in with practical strategies to engage, build trust, and strengthen your approach to creating great workplaces through allyship.

Carin Taylor
Chief Diversity Officer of Workday

Diversity, equity, and inclusion leaders understand how critical it is to have everyone, especially men, engaged in the work of creating an inclusive workplace (organization, society!) where all people can thrive. The challenge is making the space for men to truly connect, reflect and then eventually act—one that doesn’t also cast shame, and blame, and does more harm than good. Showing Up explores healthy masculinity through Ray Arata’s inimitable voice to create that space. It’s a must-read for practitioners to then share with the men in their lives and organizations.

Cristina Santos
Head of Diversity & Inclusion and Equal Employment Opportunity, North America, Sanofi